Sunday, September 27, 2015

Rewind on cloudy skies

The mercury retrograde this time has been so moving for me. It's not as dramatic as the previous one and it didn't get me bouncing off the walls as well. It was just in a way, quiet and really allowed me to get in touch with my past which is basically what mercury retrogrades give us time for. For those of you who aren't fans of astrology, mercury retrogrades are that period when Mercury (the planet) slows down and appears to be revolving backwards. The way it affects the universe is that it favors activities that involves RE- revisiting, reconnecting, rekindling, restarting, etc. So you might notice a lot of old friends suddenly popping in or old unfinished projects that you decide to continue. It's always been emotional for me cause this period makes it hard to plan anything in the future. Plans fall out and if you know me enough, you know I get crazy when this happens.

The mercury retrograde this time however has been good to me. The timing was perfect cause it fell on my mom's birthday and it gave me time to reflect a bit and just reconnect with my past.  I've been, in a way running away from it but I realized now that you can't completely turn your back on your past. It's part of who you are, it's what made you the person you are today and no matter how much you just want to  turn a new leaf; start a new life; you can't completely cut yourself from your history. You have to embrace it. Let it be a reminder of the things you've gone through, your goals when the world wasn't as complicated yet, and may it guide you in choosing your future path.

This period allowed me to reconnect with friends as well and close off unfinished chapters in my book. The biggest lesson for me is realizing that memories have to be honored. It might not be something you enjoyed but in the end, you have to honor that it happened. And no matter how much it has altered your life, you have to acknowledge it. Make it part of who you are. Be proud of it; honor the people who helped you get to where you are now; the people who helped you forget.

We go through a lot in life just so in the end we can tell stories. And the most amazing stories are those that are filled with adventure. Those that are a bit challenging, a bit dramatic, a little heartbreaking. Those are the kind of stories that make for a meaningful life. That's the kind of life you would want to one day be telling your grandchildren about. 

I am grateful for the mercury retrograde because it allowed me to remind myself of who I was before. Reminded me of what my life has been, what I've achieved so far, and just served as a way for me to stop and count my blessings. 

In all these, I just want to honor my mother. She was the most influential person in my life and no matter how people see me or her, they can never take away the fact that she was a good-hearted and wonderful woman. They can judge us or say things about us but I choose to honor her memory and believe in the pureness of her love and her desire to ensure a good life for me. 

I took the outfit photos when we visited her for her birthday. I was half expecting rainbows cause I've always believed seeing rainbows meant she was smiling down on me. But I never saw rainbows that day. Still, it doesn't matter so much anymore. I was there to remember. Just to be reminded of her love and with and without rainbows, I know I carry her heart with me. I carry it in mine.

Revenge printed top - Revenge Fork
Black shorts - Forever 21
White sneakers - Cotton On
Sunglasses - Sunnies

Friday, September 25, 2015

The Story of Us: NinJay

"I used to think one day, we'd tell the story of us, how we met and the sparks flew instantly, and people would say, "They're the lucky ones."

I think it is only fitting to tell "the story of us" now that EJ and I are celebrating our 6th month together. I know couples will understand when I say, months and years feel long when you're in a relationship. It feels so good to be celebrating milestones and just looking back at how far you've gone together.

Six months.

But honestly, our story started way longer than that. Specifically, two years ago.

It was August 1, 2013 when I received my first email from him. The subject was, "Hello". It was short and sweet, and like how I tease him about it now... business-like. 

We were brought together by EJ's godmother, she was trying to pair us but he's in Canada and I'm in the Philippines, so in my head, no way was it gonna work. But I didn't mind gaining a new friend, so what the heck. We were emailing each other for about 3 months, added each other on Facebook but really didn't think it would go anywhere than that. Around that time however, the email exchanges started to get longer, we became more interested in each other's lives and for some weird reason, I developed the biggest crush on him. Still, it was a difficult set up so again, I didn't think it would go any further than a crush.

November came however, and I got a black box delivered to my office. It was so freaky cause it was around Halloween but when I opened it, I found these inside:

It was the first time that I kinda considered the possibility of an "us". It was so surprising for me to have someone court me all the way from across the world. He was far from me, there was the time difference (his morning is my evening) and there was just no way he could do it. Right? Well, I was definitely wrong. He started courting me with gifts during occasions (where I first learned all about shipping and customs regulations in the Philippines haha)


And he started this random campaign on Instagram "Why Ninin Should Visit Canada"

I reciprocated by sending him gifts as well and we were doing all the courting online.

We moved from emailing each other to Viber-ing everyday. Despite the distance, we grew very close until after more than a year of talking, he finally booked himself a flight to Manila :)

We finally met in March this year. It was one of the most emotional periods in my life but that experience made me realize how much I love him and distance, time or any other obstacle can't stand against us. We both took a leap of faith with each other, it was moving and definitely life changing. We both never had relationships before. I was 26 and he was 30, but on March 24, 2015 we decided to lose the "no boyfriend/girlfriend since birth title" and took that once-in-a-lifetime chance with each other. Here's a little video I did to capture our first moments as a couple:

NinJay from Ninin Sampiano on Vimeo.

Thank you EJ for the wonderful 6 months! I am beyond grateful for this moment here... to be telling our story and remembering all that we're gone through together. Happy 6 months, pangga! Here's to many more for us! I love you!

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